Allie

I'm 14. A man pretending to be homeless caught my attention. I love to help others. I gave him money but it never seemed to be enough. I did everything to please him, but he would often get angry and violent towards me. I just want him to hold me like he used to and tell me that everything will be okay.

He broke my arm, but I'm afraid to go to the hospital. I've been to so many, and I'm running out of options. Yesterday he was mad at me because I was 5 dollars short. He cut me with a knife making 5 perfectly straight lines so that I'll always know how to count to 5 now. I hate him so much, and yet I can't stop loving him.

He once was my hero because he saved me from my boyfriend who tried to rape me. Then he takes me back to his place and rapes me for hours. I just want to be free. Why is he always mad at me? What have I done so wrong? I try so hard to make him happy.

I'm tired of living this life. Everyone asks me what the bruises and scrapes and burns are from, but I just make up a story and they sometimes believe me. I hurt so bad. I've tried to commit suicide twice. I was sent to a mental hospital but never really helped me.

I feel like no one is on my side. I feel so alone. Someone please help me.

Comments for Allie

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Jul 02, 2014
You are loved.
by: Anonymous

Allie,

If you are in the U.S.A., please call (800) 422-4453 to get help or else call your local law enforcement agency. The few bad people in this world can make it feel like everyone hates you, but the TRUTH is there are many more millions of people who CARE ABOUT YOU and want to see you in a safe situation. Taking care of your safety and well-being is true "love." You should immediately report anyone who hurts you and seek help. You can always start the process of finding "real" help by calling the one the hotlines on this website. The people and volunteers care about you.

Jul 09, 2015
You are loved, Read this now then leave
by: Anonymous

Allie - You are loved and you are not alone. The mental hospital did not help you because you do not have a mental problem. You are with a man with a problem. Get away from this man today. I have four steps to suggest: 1) Write down the number below or this number 800-799-7233. They can help you find a place to stay if you cannot stay with family or friends. 2) Leave the place where you are staying with this man immediately after reading this and do not tell him where you are going. 3) When you leave, call one of the numbers to find a shelter. 4) Go to the shelter and focus on getting yourself healthy and safe. Keep going to high school. When you are at a safe place, you will find some clarity to figure out a longer term solution or place to stay. Keep fighting for yourself.

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