Recognizing the Domestic Violence Signs

Too much Grrrrr, bark, and woof?

Dog Park domestic violence signs

Use the checklist below if you Throw the Dog House at Her! What???

I'm grateful to have a partnership without any history of domestic violence signs. Although lately, I've been thinking about my first few years of marriage. And, I would admit that my wife and I were still growing up for quite a while after we got engaged and married, which led to the infamous "dog house event."

Checklist for Symptoms of Domestic Violence - Ask yourself the questions in this handy list to assess your risk and know if you are being abused.

At times, things got a little rocky in our marriage. But, our disagreements never ended up in violence or an abuse. Just typical arguments among a couple where we both would take turns arguing our side. Neither of use was controlling the other, and we were quite equal, just not in the most loving way that we preferred all of the time.

Our disagreements reflected the every day reality of working out how to give and take and be equal partners in a marriage, which is hard after being independent for so long.

Fortunately, over time, that has all improved as we've learned to appreciate each of our personalities and strengths and serve each other graciously. One really cool thing that helped us to understand each other as a couple was taking the Meyers-Briggs type indicator. I recommend it to any couple, as a window into your intimate partner's thoughts. Deeper understanding of each other through the Meyers-Briggs increased our intimacy greatly.

What about "The Dog House Incident?"

Doghouse Incident

We did have one incident in our early marriage where I really put myself in the proverbial Dog House. You see, I threw a large dog crate across our bedroom out of frustration and to get attention. Whew! That was really stupid. One foolish moment can impact our life forever if we do not practice self-control. I'm sure that she would have walked out and never come back right at that moment had things gotten worse.

Fortunately, she did not get hit by the crate or anything else ever by me. And, after that scare, I certainly never picked up another dog house to throw out of frustration.

In our case, it was not a cycle of violence, and there were no signs of exercise of control over my partner, or fear or intimidation involved. Instead it was a moment of loss of self-control and foolish expression for attention on my part that made me realize being selfish and immature was stupid and not worth the potential costs.

Since then, we've had our disagreements, but our words are never "mean" or meant to cause emotional harm, and we certainly never use physical coercion or threats of any violence to settle our differences. Such actions are just plain wrong. They never settle anything, and such actions of abuse are blatant attempts to control another person without any regard for the other's well-being. 

We hope to help you recognize domestic violence signs with the articles and pages that follow.

If you are a VICTIM, move forward in your journey to escape domestic violence without any hesitation. You will be helped if you tell the right people. Call a Hotline, where volunteers and professionals really care about your protection and well-being.

The following topics were written to give you clear understanding of warning signs or symptoms of abuse by an intimate partner.

These domestic violence signs should help you make the decision to get help, find the power to overcome fear, and to move on to a productive and happy life.....

Tools and Techniques for
Screening Domestic Violence Signs

Domestic Violence Definition

  • Understanding the different forms of domestic abuse beyond just physical violence can help you understand domestic violence signs related to verbal, emotional or sexual abuse.

Self-Assessment for Partner Abuse

  • Ask a few honest questions using this tool and determine if calling a local shelter or hotline is needed to get more information about the signs of domestic violence.
  • In a hurry, a quick domestic violence questionnaire can give you an instant answer to whether a person should seek domestic violence help.

Early Warning Signs of Domestic Violence

  • Recognize at the beginning of your relationship whether there are signals that you are in an abusive situation with an intimate partner.

Detecting the Warning Signs of Domestic Violence in Friends and Family Relationships

  • Review these warning signs to see if it may be time to intervene to help a friend or family member that is being abused.

HITS Screening Tool for Intimate Partner Violence

Watch "The little things you can't miss" to recognize the signs of verbal abuse in a relationship.

Seeing and acting upon the symptoms and warnings of domestic abuse and violence is the first step to ending the problem and starting over. No one should live in fear of another person in a relationship. If you recognize yourself or someone you know in the descriptions and signs of domestic violence, don’t hesitate to seek help. There is relief and refuge available.

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